How To Build a Winning Family
“Not everyone has something special to show his guests.” I thought to myself as my host for the day took me out for a tour around his property yesterday afternoon.
The only tour some people may have when they visit friends and relatives is the way to the bathroom and their bed for the night, thus if they’re sleeping over. We moved around as we feasted our sight on various birds both indigenous and exotic, animals and the multi-colored vegetable garden indicative of the various kinds of crops he produces at his residence.
This guy is an executive of a top media and advertising company in the country, he has some properties dotted around the leafy suburbs of Harare, but for some reason, he chose Domboshava as his quarters.
According to him, the vast land he owns in that part of the country allows him to indulge into anything his enterprising mind gives him, but that’s a subject for another day.
Some few hours before he had summoned his entire family members into the sitting room for a Family Coaching session. Everyone coiled into their seat with strange anticipation as they glared on a clean whiteboard, wondering what I was going to write on it.
The silence in the house was deafening for a moment such that you could hear the buzz of a house-fly tripping across the lounge, but as we waded deeper into the business of the day the coldness of silence melted because of the warmth of various bursts of laughter.
I motioned my hand that held the whiteboard marker onto the clean board to write family orientation concepts necessary to the birthing and crafting of a trans-generational family vision, mission and values. I know very much that this practice is rare to people of my race, but successful families don’t just happen, they’re created when we’re deliberate with employing factors that are tantamount to birthing growth, progress and success. All this depends on the family mode that you choose.
You must have heard of families that are like law firms. Everyone in that family is a lawyer or aspiring to become one. There are other families that are baptized into teaching, medicine, pastoral and so forth. If you’re born into such a family, it’s noble to realize that you have a great advantage to build on the profession that your family has reputation over.
You can pursue your other passions, but use the profession that associates with your family name as a cash cow to finance other interests you might have. Anyone hailing from the Guti family has greater acceptance in ministry than in engineering. Sulumani Chimbetu is bound to make much by singing than as a chef.
Parents have a strong influence over the choice of career for their children. Parents who do things together will automatically inspire their kids to do likewise. The Charambas and Carter families are most likely to produce children that are keen to work as spouses in the areas of talent or profession. The good thing about this model is that couples who work together are bound to love each other the more and have a deeper sense of family at heart.
Most transgenerational business are founded on this basis. A family is a melting pot of diverse talent, skill and profession. Members with this family model at heart may see it pointless to employ an outsider for a position that a certain family member has the same skill for. Years ago, I got my first job at the now defunct Meikles Departmental Store as a sales floor assistant.
The job was taxing on my body, I could spend six to eight hours standing with brief episodes of rest. Barely a week into it, I began to visit the bathroom much frequently, mostly to catch a breath. Now I can spend the whole day or night grinding and hustling, not only because I’m hustling my passion, but the idea that I’m working on something that is mine often gives the much-needed focus and energy. Most people struggle with endurance when working on something that isn’t theirs. Trap your family’s energy and potential by setting up a common plate that you all benefit from.
This family model often allows the vast talent and skill they have as family to fly freely all over the place. Because they lack the willingness to harness their potential, they end-up losing their riches to stronger family models. There is no glory in donating your skill elsewhere for a salary, rather begin to see your diverse talents as potential avenues you can expand your family business into building an empire that your future progeny will be proud to look at. Families that work together stick together. I wish you a happy and prosperous family.